I believe that a funeral is the celebration of a life, and that celebrating the life by recounting memories and achievements, helps us to celebrate the legacy a loved one leaves for future generations.
When a loved one dies it can be difficult to think straight, and so many things need to be done in a short space of time, that it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. This is where I can help. I have experienced loss, and although it’s impossible to know exactly how others feel, I have an understanding of some of the practicalities that need to be dealt with and tying up all the loose ends.
Funeral Directors provide excellent help with the legalities and paperwork, and are extremely compassionate people and will help with much of the organising. But there comes a time when decisions need to be made about what and who you want to be involved in paying tribute to the life of your family member or friend. I can help you to design a ceremony that celebrates the achievements, qualities and characteristics of your loved one so that everyone at the funeral will come away knowing him or her just that little bit better.
I always like to sit with as many members of the family as possible, for as long as possible, so that I can learn about the loved one and can write an introduction that covers all aspects of the life. I can help you with readings or poems that could be included, help to coach and support family members and friends who would like to participate, and incorporate mementos and cultural practices that would be meaningful. If you would prefer, I can take the whole ceremony for you, if this makes it easier for you.
I will never impose my ideas on you as to what to include or say at a funeral. As a celebrant my aim is to provide ideas and thoughts that will help you to celebrate your loved one’s life. Any introduction or eulogy that I write will be approved by you before the ceremony is finalised, and I adhere to the high standard of professionalism that is upheld by Civil Celebrants.
Over the past year I have been approached by families who have terminally ill loved ones, and have worked with the family to design a ceremony that they feel would be fitting – often with the help of the terminally ill family member. This takes a lot of the anxiety away when a funeral is often held only a few days after the death and people find it hard to make decisions.
For a funeral I negotiate an hourly fee for planning, so you can tailor how elaborate or simple you would like the ceremony to be and to suit your budget. Generally the funeral directors suggest what the celebrant’s fee is likely to be, and this can be negotiated.